Ricky Martin opens up about the anxiety he felt before coming out. The “Livin’ la Vida Loca” singer has been in the entertainment business for a long time, but he only came out in 2010.
Ricky Martin has sold over 70 million records. He became a true sex symbol, and everyone loved him. His eleventh album will drop soon, and he plans a tour with Enrique Iglesias.
In his personal life, he is married to Jwan Yosef since 2017, and the two have four children together.
But despite his superstar status, Ricky admits feeling insecure, and socially awkward. Just like the rest of us.
In a new interview with PEOPLE, Ricky Martin talked about coming out, the anxiety he felt having to hide his true self, and how the interview with Barbara Walters affected him.
Ricky shared about his social awkwardness, and said: “I’m super socially awkward but today, well the difference is that I know I’m socially awkward. So, I don’t go anywhere that causes me anxiety. I’m at peace with performing in front of 30,000 people and feel like the king of the world. But then I walk into a small room at an intimate gathering, and someone will say, ‘Hey Rick, sing a song for us!’ and that creates such anxiety.”
He also revealed he struggled with his sexuality. He publicly dated women, and sometimes, he dated men in private.
“A lot of people have said, ‘Rick, you were trying to prove yourself, because of fame and being a sex symbol.’ Well yeah, it could be. I don’t know. Everyone knows you don’t have to be a gay man to know that love is complicated. Or to know how confusing attraction can be. Am I gay? Am I bisexual? Am I confused? What am I?'”
“Sexuality is one complicated thing. It’s not black and white. It’s filled with colors. When I was dating women, I was in love with women. It felt right, it felt beautiful. You can’t fake chemistry —the chemistry was there with them. I wasn’t misleading anyone.”
But 10 years before he came out, during his interview with Barbara Walters, she addressed the gay rumors. She said: “You could stop these rumors. You could say, ‘Yes I am gay or no I’m not.'” At the moment, he said: “I just don’t feel like it.”
In the new interview, Ricky Martin said his coming out felt amazing. But, in that moment, the question surprised him. “When she dropped the question, I felt violated because I was just not ready to come out. I was very afraid. There’s a little PTSD with that.”
“A lot of people say, what would you do differently? Well, maybe I would have come out in that interview. It would’ve been great because when I came out, it just felt amazing. When it comes to my sexuality, when it comes to who I am, I want to talk about what I’m made of, about everything that I am. Because if you hide it, it’s a life-or-death situation.”
